Husband's Size

[WonderingWife]

Just wondering if this is normal: I never feel my husband inside me. It's like there's nothing going on at all! My Gynecologist says I'm not "stretched out" at all inside, so it can't be me and he is actually a very average size so I'm thinking we are not a good match for each other, sexually. :(

Also, I NEVER orgasm from sex, ever. I only cum from my own masturbation, no matter how hard we try. And even then, I have to work very hard to get myself going, sometimes I just get too tired from the effort and quit. Plus, it's crazy, because I only feel "horny" during the shiva neki'im! As soon as that week is over, I discover I have no libido. Any advice would be welcome.

Thanks.

[Guest]

If your using a lube use less.

[Guest]

[quote="WonderingWife"]Also, I NEVER orgasm from sex, ever. [/quote]

Most people don't; They need stimulation of the clitoris in order to orgasm, and intercourse alone is often not well-suited for this. Instead, you or he can manually stimulate you while he is in you or he could manually stimulate you before (or after) entering you. There are also many other options that are "normal". The best thing is to understand that there is no standard -- what works for you is "normal" for you and should not depend on anyone else's experiences.

[There are other options!]

The size doesn't necessarily mean anything. A few factors can work...Are you having enough foreplay? Longer foreplay can get you in the mood. Also, what do you do while masturbating get yourself to come? Is it through your g-spot or clit that does it for you? (Or both) A woman can't necessarily orgasm during sex itself, but if you can orgasm with clitoris stimulation, you can touch or have him touch your clit during sex. (That's what gets me to orgasm during sex) You can teach him what gets you going when you masturbate, so he can do the same to you. Hope that's helpful!

[Guest]

I don't think lube has anything to do with it. Some ppl need lube bc their bodies don't naturally produce it. I'm like that. DH and I tried using less or none at all and it was just painful b/c it wasn't wet enough.

[Guest]

well I don't know about your first problem but I definitely understand the second! It's sooo frustrating how I only seem to have that major desire for my husband during the "off" days while when we are on I want him but not in that urgent way..I chalked it up to wanting what you can't have...

[Wondering Wife]

Thanks for the responses, but nothing really addressed my issue. I have no idea what this "wonderful" sex experience is all about that people talk of and I'm really getting annoyed. To me, sex is a boring chore. Foreplay just doesn't do it. Oh, and we usually don't need lube, so that can't be it.

Any other ideas?

[random guy]

[quote="Guest"]well I don't know about your first problem but I definitely understand the second! It's sooo frustrating how I only seem to have that major desire for my husband during the "off" days while when we are on I want him but not in that urgent way..I chalked it up to wanting what you can't have...[/quote]

מים גנובים ימתקו
Stolen waters taste sweeter.

[a hubby]

Try having sex with u on top. I find my DW only orgasms in that position. Its deeper & the penis has more contact with the clit. Hope it helps u.

[a wife]

For women, sometimes reaching orgasm is totally mental.
Try picturing your husband and yourself in a fantasy situation, i.e. on a beach, as first-timers, use your imagination here... Picture the scene vividly in your head, with sound effects, as you are in the act. Combine that with some well-timed manual stimulation to the clit by yourself or your husband and you should have some explosive moments. Works for me.
Good luck!

[Guest]

Lube does make a difference. the right amount is great. Too much diminishes sensation. (A tiny drop of friction is good).